Five out of my seven intimate friends has admitted to me that one of their parents is/was cheating on their spouse. It is upsetting to hear such a thing from their children.
The latest friend to confide in me narrated a tale of a lowly and disgusting man hiding under the veil of a concerned, respectable father. No one knows whether it was a one-night stand or a long affair of which was the result his illegitimate child with a junior employed then, at his office. Soon his attention strayed, nights were increasingly spent with his girlfriend instead of with his family. My friend, who was particularly close to her father was disturbed by his sudden distant behavior. The family noticed but blamed it on work. At the same time, underworld threats dogged his family and himself. He told his family, he was fighting child trafficking being sanctioned by his compeers. For two years, that this drama lasted, without any income in the house for months at a time, they supported him and stood by him. They laughed and danced to ease his mind and win a smile. Even when the police knocked their door at midnight and arrested him, they rallied strongly around him, fighting tooth and nail to get him out. Two unending years ended, their Gandhian father was their hero.
In spite of it, the chasm between him and the family widened, he was home only every alternate night, things were so bad that no one even asked him where he’d been caught up; they were just glad to have him home.
His love child turned four. By this time, the child’s mother had mysteriously left her previous office and found a spacious flat to live in, with enough furniture and luxury amenities, some of which my friend herself was not fortunate enough to enjoy. Under the pretext of weak business, he made the family cut costs.
It can not be a pleasant feeling for anyone at any age to know that they have a half-brother or sister. My friend found out at the age of 21. She knew things about her father that no child should. Pornographic images of the ‘other’ woman and himself were recovered from his camera. ‘Sister of a bar dancer!’ my friend anguished, ‘went from living in the slums to plush flats.’
She knows, her siblings know, her mother knows. As they lean on each other for support vengeful fantasies soothe their minds. They know, neither of them would stoop so low, but any way to ease pain works now.
Her sister called him a ‘pervert’ she said. Not any reason ever can ease a suffering of this kind. Though I wonder if not their filial connection to him is greater than his moral obligations? Agreed that moral is also accompanied by emotional and that of trust; but ought he to be judged by a morality that is in itself un-constant and evolving? He remains a father to those kids and he ought to be judged when he abstains from his paternal obligations. Not any more.
